Thursday, December 2, 2010

Total Breakdown


I'm completely falling apart.

Told my husband I'm ready to just die. Life doesn't get any better, if God even exists he obviously doesn't care, and I hate everyone and everything especially my husband.

Everyone thinks I'm so strong. I'm NOT. I've just managed to somehow survive more traumatic life events in the past 30 years than most "normal" people.

Dumb luck.

I'm miserable.


  1. (((Katie))) God does exist and he knew you would reach this point. He is walking right alongside you and he does care. I don't know why he allowed all the things he did that you went through. I know in my life it made me rely on him more. praying.....


  2. Strength is surviving. There are so many people, even those in our situation, who disconnect from life, their loved ones, God and even their angel babies because the grief is so overwhelming. You are still a part of the world and making sure your all your children are a part of it too- and that makes you strong. I can't recognize my own strength because I feel so depressed, but that's what family and friends are there for- to remind you that you are, even when you feel like you aren't.